Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Monday, December 29, 2008

Love is slow

My son received this for Valentine's Day last year. At first glance it seemed like a cute, brightly colored pencil. Then I looked a bit closer.



What the...?


Saturday, December 27, 2008

I know you've got 'em!

Now is the time to look through the gifts you received, and take some photos of the hideous ones and send them my way!
Send to:
Thanks!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas!

'Tis the season to receive hideous gifts! If you get one (or some), please email me pics and I will be glad to post them! Send to:
Merry Christmas!!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Bottled up angst



This was sent in by someone who received it from her in-laws last Christmas. It is a family tradition of theirs to add a gag gift into the pile. So, when she opened this gift, she almost started to laugh, assuming that she was the recipient of the gag gift. Then she glanced at the earnest looks on the faces of her in-laws and realized, with a shock of horror, that this was NOT the gag gift.

Friday, December 19, 2008

I get misty just looking at this



Here we have this lovely Maid of the Mist Niagara Falls key holder. It appears to be from the 60s or 70s, but it is actually from 2008. Not only do we get the scenic photo of the Falls, but as an added bonus there is a little replica of the boat, complete with passengers (look closely, and you will see that the one in the middle on the bottom appears to be praying for his life). Now who wouldn't want to see this every time they went to get their keys?

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

World's Most Hideous Pez



I am a big fan of Pez. I think they are loads of fun. Usually. I really don't understand what this is supposed to be. A baby human hatching out of an egg? Long lost member of the Lollipop Guild? Whatever it is, it is creeping me out.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

World's Strangest Ornament award goes to...


I don't remember who gave this to me, but I am positive that I didn't buy it. I don't quite get what is happening here. Is it an angel in a sleeping bag? Or an angel that had way too much egg nog? And what is with the tassel? Maybe it is a slumber party angel graduate.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Reminder #2: do not buy books from bargain stores


This book was given to my young children. It is like a circus freak book for kids who can't actually make it to the circus. What is worse, when you turn each page, the mother grows another arm until she has 20 of them. Guaranteed to give your kids nightmares.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Boyfriend Deterrent


My father gave this to me when I was a teenager. Notice how it has not been used. My father's ploy did not work.
I guess this could be useful if you need an excuse for why you were late for work. "I was walking to work (right there you get points because walking to work is environmentally correct) and I tripped and fell into a ditch. I was there for hours."

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Not enough money to buy the whole song


This goes under the category of the Most Unrewarding Gifts I Have Ever Received.

Friday, December 12, 2008

New rare fruit discovered


Here is a lovely gift that my husband received at his Yankee Swap at work last year- an ambient diffuser which releases the succulent scents of strawberry and...



payaya.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Apology

"I am so sorry. I really and truly am. Please accept this carrot as a sincere token of my sorrow and regret."
I received this when I was a child and it depressed me so much that I put it in the back of a drawer and left it there until now. And, back it goes.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Reminder: do not buy books from bargain stores


My daughter received this book from a relative. Looks cute, right? A little bunny serving tea.


The Misery Reminder

This is a gift that I received a few years ago from my husband. It still hangs on our wall because, from afar, it appears to be a nice gift. A weather center. I was very happy to have received it as I do enjoy following the weather. However, once I put the batteries in things changed.






When the humidity is at a low level, this frowning face appears on the screen. Why? Is it reminding me to be miserable because it is so dry in my house? That every breath that I take of the arid air will crack the membranes inside of my nose and dry out my throat? That I cannot possibly be happy in this environment? Yesterday I thought I was happy but then I glanced at the weather center and I remembered that I wasn't.


Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The mystery gift

Can you guess what this is? I didn't know until I asked the person who gave it to me. "It's a pencil holder!" they exclaimed. Now, can you guess what happens when I try to put pencils into it?






Monday, December 8, 2008

We need photos of your hideous gifts!

OK everyone! It is time to dig in your closets and excavate some hideous gifts that you have received! All you need to do is email a photo to me and I will post your hideous gift on my blog (anonymously, if you so choose). Start hunting!
Email to:
kelleyandjason@yahoo.com

There are no words

This was given to a friend of mine. Not on Halloween. I am not exactly sure what it is supposed to be. A wizard's corpse? A boxing goblin? Your guess is as good as mine.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Here lies basketball


This is the participation trophy that my kids received for playing basketball. Basketball was a great sport, but now it has come to its final resting place.


R.I.P.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Let's kick off the weekend


From the Jeffrey Dahmer Office Collection we have this fine foot pencil holder. This was given to me by an old neighbor (who has since moved and left no forwarding address). This is so realistic that I think I can actually see the veins throbbing. And it smells.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Creepy Evil Moon Face



An old boyfriend gave this to me years and years ago. It says a lot about our relationship, doesn't it? Some of the finer details are the crooked, misshapen teeth (one of them is even gold), and the fabulous mole to the lower right of the nose. But the BEST part about this hideous gift is the moving pupils and tongue. Yes, the black pupils are loose in their sockets and the round, pink, BUMPY tongue is loose in its mouth. So when this moon is rocked from side to side, these parts roll back and forth. You are probably wondering why I still have this. I am afraid to get rid of it, like it will come back and haunt me or something. I should go bury it in my backyard and be done with it.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

It's just what I've always wanted



I was at a loss for words when this was given to me. I am still a bit speechless. The maker of this piece did a fantastic job with the color scheme, don't you think? Aside from the obviously horrendous purple/green combo, I love the little details like the yellow in only the purple bunny's ears, and the wonderfully orange sponge holding the timer. The bunnies actually look a bit embarrassed to be involved in this. I don't blame them.

A blog that showcases truly hideous gifts

Welcome to my new blog! This blog will showcase truly hideous gifts that people have received. Please feel free to send in any photos of hideous gifts that you have. You can include your name, or you can remain anonymous. Later this evening I will post a hideous gift that I received a few months ago. Thanks for reading and please remember to check back for some truly hideous fun!